needs, schmeeds

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So in an attempt to squeeze deeper meaning out of this day, I googled my needs just like half the rest of the population of Myspace did, originating with Ruggi’s friend Sharron.

At any rate, in search of enlightenment, I googled with “2N Needs” and all I got (of note) was this:

“In order for sexual reproduction to be successful, the 2n organism needs to reduce this number of chromosomes as it reproduces.”

That is…a little alarming. So then I googled with my real name. Apparently, 2N…

  • …needs constant motivation and inspiration. She’s kind of needy and sometimes she’s rude to people. wow, cutting to the core right off the bat.
  • …needs lots of reassurance that she is worth loving. good thing I don’t beleive in horoscopes either. Psh.
  • …needs to know about lifestyle changes such as salt and fluid restriction. what? Starbuck’s doesn’t have salt in their coffee. I don’t think.
  • …needs to shed the 60’s Liz Taylor image. So, you’re saying the black and white hair is a no-go? What about my bling?
  • …needs to get her facts straight, dumb chick. Given.
  • …needs a pigfoot and a bottle of beer. I sure don’t know what a pigfoot is, but I would be glad to have one with my beer. I think.
  • …needs to be more sexy. Whooooeeee.
  • …needs some time and space away. From…?
  • …needs all the help she can get. Noted.
  • …needs a digital camera to take pictures. YES!
  • …needs to be kicked to the curb! PLEASE! Put me out of my misery!
  • …needs to retire. Is that with or without the millions of dollars I plan to win in Powerball?

Most of these were directed at a certain political figure that shares my name, but damn if they aren’t funny when applied out of context.

So based on the above, I am pretty much an antisocial, pathetic heap of slobbering retirement-ready neediness, and I need to work on not being rude while on my Myspace sabbatical.

Sabbatical? Not bloody likely.

So that was humorous but not really what I am looking for. So. You tell me.

“2N Needs…?” What? Or just tell me the “one word”. You have to read my Love & Lust blog to know to what I refer. Go ahead. Shoot.

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