Tag: drunk dialing

a typical sunday…abstinence is for assholes

7:26 AM: Realize that the wet drip, drip drip on my face is not in fact the result of fantabulously-hot-dream-guy’s unrestrainble passion for me, but instead the slimy output of my dog’s panting tongue. He’s staring soulfully into my eyes in a mute attempt to warn me that if I don’t get up ASAP I

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