Ahhhhh.

It’s Kid night, I have a fresh bottle of wine (just opened), a little extra cash in the bank account, and my favorite cheezy poof snacks…the perfect ingredients for an evening filled with my favorite pastime. Wishlisting at Amazon.com. This is especially fun at this time of year, when I start thinking about gardening, and home improvements, and spring cleaning (which, apparently, I can purchase a robot that will handle for me), and I start thinking about all the cool things I could buy for the house that don’t really help me accomplish any of the above but are sure neat. I call this the “spring buzz”. It’s the time of year when I start itching to go to Home Depot (my second favorite real-life store) and start haunting their home and garden sections, or going to Target and sitting in their plush outdoor furniture under those cool garden gazebos and pretend I have a million bucks to spend on generally worthless home products.

I love Amazon because they have so many frickin’ departments, and the best thing is, they have The Wishlist. This is an easy, delightfully sedentary way for me to pretend like I’m spending a lot of money while not actually spending any at all. Rather than click “Add to Cart” I get almost the same rush by clicking “Add to Wishlist”…the only (admittedly debatable) drawback is that the items never actually arrive at my front door. From time to time I will actually go into my Wishlist and actually purchase something from off of it, but mostly I just like to admire my long list of items. Another benefit is, that half the time I actually go to buy something off of my Wishlist, I’ve decided I don’t want it anymore. So really, I’m saving myself a good deal of time and trouble of returning something (or being stuck with something) I don’t actually want in the long run.

Tonight’s Wishlisting expedition has been unusually fruitful. Apparently you can now purchase (and Wishlist) items from Target (my favorite real-life store) right from Amazon.com, in addition to all the cool stuff already on the site. Pure bliss.

It’s hours and hours of entertainment, really. I just go to the general category I want to browse, and just start clicking through pages. Today, it’s Housewares. It’s astounding how many gizmos and gadgets are out there that I never even knew I wanted!

Take this Eastman Outdoors 38229 Reveo MariVac Food Tumbler, for instance:

At first blush, I have no idea what it is, but I feel I must have one. As I read further into the product description, I find that it is actually for marinating your meat (heh). Now, I know exactly one recipe that calls for marinating my meat (heh twice), so this particular item would get used, oh, maybe once a month. However! Who can resist steaks you can “slice through with a butter knife”? Maybe if I had one I would have said steaks more than once a month. Plus it has a nifty little live action barrel that actually does appear to tumble the meat (heh for third and last time). This is a must have.

Another item that I am drooling over right now is the iRobot 5800 Scooba Floor-Washing Robot:

How freaking cool is THIS? I mean seriously. It’s a round little flying saucer that scoots around cleaning my floor, so I can sit on my couch eating cheezy poofs and Wishlisting while still getting things done. I must have it, immediately – $300 price tag be-damned. They also, conveniently enough, have an iRobot Vacuuming Robot (in silver & black or white) that runs around vacuuming everything too. And the accessories! From storage caddies to drive-on charging stations, to replacement packs (excuse me, “Replenishing” packages), little infrared line thingies that stop them from going somewhere you don’t want, to extra bottles of special Scooba cleaning solution, this is definitely something I must get (or at least, Wishlist).

While we’re on the subject of automation, I am also considering the Bissell 1200 A Blue Illusion SpotBot Pet Hands-Free Compact Deep Cleaner.

Yes, folks, you just stick this little bad boy right over your icky pet mess and it figures out just how much cleaner to use and handily makes short work of said icky pet mess. Meanwhile, of course, freeing me up for more (you guessed it) cheezy poofing and Wishlisting. Um, YAY!

Where I really get lost, though, is the “Customers who bought this item also bought…” I could get lost in there for hours. That’s how I loaded up on all red gadgets and cookware for my dream kitchen (also red). Except sometimes the “also bought” items don’t really make sense. For example, customers who bought my Ionic Pro Ionic Air Purifier also bought a Mogu Small Heart 7×9 Decorative Pillow. In red. Maybe it would go with my kitchen.

Now, if I were a beer drinker, I would certain Wishlist the Mr. Beer Deluxe Edition Home Microbrewery System. I mean, it’s a cute little keg!

And it includes a dozen plastic bottle caps printed with the Mr. Beer logo! I do have to wonder, however, whoever heard of plastic bottle caps? Next!

This one, I actually may purchase at some point: the Back to Basics TEM500 Egg-And-Muffin 2-Slice Toaster and Egg Poacher (are you loving the detailed product names I am giving you or what?!):

Being that I love McDonald’s Sausage Egg McMuffins, this would actually be something I could see using. Not only does it toast your muffins and poach your eggs, but it also warms your pre-cooked meats (HEH!) AND boils up to four eggs. This is actually going to be a new member of the 2N household fairly soon, I think. I wish they had it in red.